Last week, Film School Friday taught our loyal readers how to survive an awkward family gathering but in the real world, there are far more dangerous things we must learn to survive if we're going to make it to 2014. Global warming. Terrorism. Miley Cyrus...But all of these threats to civilization mean nothing if we don't survive as a species. Movies have taught me literally everything I know and so I can guarantee that even if we survive these other threats, aliens will invade the planet Earth. Game over man, GAME OVER!
Now I don't know why alien species want our planet so badly. Maybe their own planet is dying out or maybe it's for the twinkies, but whatever the reason, we need to prepare, so let's get inside the mind of our enemy and pretend for just a few minutes that we are the invading force. That way, we'll know best how to defend ourselves, so polish your laser guns, wash your spaceships and lube up your probes as we read today's lesson.